10 This week's prayer for New Mexico (sans Locksley) – Locksley might be gone, but his awful team he left behind remains. And we were once again reminded of how awful they are: Trailed woebegone New Mexico St. 21-0 at home after one quarter. Later trailed 35-7. Gave up 538 yards to one of the worst offensive teams in college football. Best (only???) hope for a win: November 12 vs UNLV, one of only two home games remaining.
9 Brett Favre, college football broadcaster – It's a combination of um, John Madden and shameless self promotion. Exactly what you would expect and just as bad too.
8 Dylan Favre, lamb led to the slaughter – Favre's nephew actually got in the game for Mississippi St. against Georgia. He promptly got sacked on his first play as his team continued to redefine offensive ineptitude after a hot start (it would appear the Mississippi St. offense is still lying bloodied and twitching down the river in the burlap sack LSU stuffed them into after beating them senseless).
7 ESPN Deportes choice of college football games – If I wanted to promote college footbal to a new audience, there are any number of good games I could have chosen from last weekend. So why on earth was ESPN Depotes showing the Ole Miss-Fresno St. game (I only know because in a brief channel change to check the score, I heard announcers yelling in Spanish on a look-in on the ESPN2 broadcast).
6 “An embarrassment to the WAC” - Those are the words of WAC commisssioner Karl Benson. So what happened? Another raid from the Mountain West sending the league further into oblivion? Boise St. is coming back to embarrass everyone else even more? Half our schools lost to FCS teams? The Sun Belt is better than us? No. None of that. How about a 22 minute replay review. Even though I have the video, I am not posting it. 22 minutes of nothing is just excruciating. Trust me. I watched it. And it is an embarrassment to the WAC, for whatever remains to embarrass.
5 The many atrocities of Penn St. and Indiana – Yes, it was bad. But I'm sure you already knew that given the awful Penn St. quarterbacking this season and Indiana in general. Just go check out this tweet from SI.com's Holly Anderson.
4 Another Tajh Boyd interception (no video this time though) – So you get a description of the only bad thing Clemson did in its destruction of Virginia Tech. In the 2nd quarter, Boyd dropped back to pass. He threw a simple stop route. Problem was, his receiver ran a go route. Bigger problem, the VT cornerback saw immediately what was happening and ran a wide receiver stop route. The ball was then thrown right to him for an interception. When playing any of the NCAA video games, this is when you yell at your game for not throwing the ball where you wanted it. But evidently, it happens in real life too.
3 Knee to the Groin
Admittedly, this is not one of those funny groin shots. It is a malicious attempt to steal some poor smart guy's manhood. This cannot be tolerated (and evidently won't be since the offending linebacker has been suspended one game).
2 Ohio St. vs Michigan St. - All you need to know is that the most similar game yardage wise to this one I have seen is the immortal 3-2 Auburn-Mississippi St. game from 2008. Between that, the awful interceptions that Spartan QB Kirk Cousins continues to throw and Ohio St. passing game that hasn't improved since the Miami debacle (one of the single worst team passing days of the last 20 years, at least by a non-option team), this game was unwatchable. Heck, this game didn't even have entertaining trainwreck qualities to it like those involved in the final game on this list this week, in part because the expectations were for sheer awful terror going into this.
1 Stephen Garcia – 12/23, 112 yards, 1TD, 2INTs. Those are not Stephen Garcia's numbers. Those are the numbers of Auburn QB Barrett Trotter who somehow managed to win. Garcia was even worse: 9/23, 160 yards (50 of those on a badly thrown jump ball where Alshon Jeffery made a spectacular play to score), 1TD (the aforementioned Jeffery play) and 2INTs. Remember that Garcia was playing against the Auburn arson squad (that would be defense) that color analyst Steve Beuerlein compared unfavorably to air in the first quarter. To describe how bad Garcia was in this game, only one thing needs to be said: Connor Shaw is starting again this week. Remember that Connor Shaw has only played four drives this season in meaningful action and those four drives landed him on this list opening week.
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